I guess I haven't posted anything since our big announcement! Not long after we announced we were having a baby we headed to IL for a couple weeks. Well I headed to IL for a couple weeks, Seth came up for one week. I had all these expectations to do a million things with a million people but good ole' mornin sickness continued with a vengeance and confined me to the couch for much of the first week there...soo plans changed. I guess that is God's way of preparing me that life is about to change and "my agenda" isn't always going to work with a little one :). Regardless of the sickness, it was wonderful! I did get to see alot of people and it was really refreshing to me. We also got some good family time, which was just awesome. I am pretty sure I was spoiled crazy. I didn't cook one meal (not that i'm doing much of that anymore anyways, haha), clean anything, or really do anything that took much effort, haha- my momma spoiled me and I wasn't going to complain because her food is gooood and it's not very often I get her cookin. I am pretty sure her cooking had something do with some pregnancy pounds put on those weeks!
Some of my favorite things from this trip: lunch at Caleri's with Bets, Mom B, & Dayne & Maggy & then just catching up on life. Girls night at Erin's house. Celebrating Rio's 1st birthday with the family & watching him dig in his cake. Taking walks just like old times with Cori on the trail and getting so much quality time with her. Visiting Mart & Cohen with Cori and seeing her new house and her little sweet boy. Having lunch with Abi & catching up. Going to Parade of Homes with my parents and dreaming with them about huge houses. Getting alot of quality time with my parents and little brother, Chad. Watching the news every night at 530 & 600 to see if Chad had done any news reports that day. Lunch with friends. Going shopping with my mom. Taking walks with my parents. Going swimming with Mom B, Bets, and the twins. Breakfast with Ty & Laura. Hanging out at the Thames house. Family dinners. Playing with my niece, Kylie Jo, in her house and swing. Chad's new go-pro camera and the video he made & how it made Jen and I cry (blame in on the pregnancy hormones!). Seeing people at church and catching up. Seeing the fireworks. Game night with Booms & Thornburgs. Lots of quality time with my sis-in-law (sister really) and getting excited for their-any-day-now-baby. Meeting Jeff's new girlfriend. Hanging out with grandpa and laughing with him. Seeing my brother, Jake, be an awesome dad. Visiting with my Aunt & Uncle. Afternoon chat with DZ & MB. Watching our families all interact with eachother and love being together. The guys on both sides doing a triathlon and succeeding! Dinner at Mom & Dad B's with the whole family and playing with the kids. Looking at diaper bags with Jackie and getting her advice. Getting a sweet new Ford Taurus to drive, such a gift, seriously! Seeing corn and cornfields. Eating at one world and avantis (alot).
Here's some of the pictures from the week:
Chasing Kylie Jo around the yard
Uncle Chad & Kylie were buddies
Grandma and Grandpa reading goodnight stories to Kylie Jo
Mom and her girl
Jay getting Rio reading to dive into his birthday cake
Darling!!
The birthday boy and his parents! Jackie made an awesome cake!
I think he liked it :)
We were able to throw a baby shower for Nat & her baby girl!
love this picture- it was one of Kylie's favorite things to do and she knew just who to ask
Precious! Grandma and Kylie Jo
I love this- they look like such buddies :)
Jen getting some sewing lessons from mom, now she's a pro :)
Kylie loved Uncle Jeff and loved it when he would play fun songs on his Ipad
A nice break from the hooooot Illinois summer with Uncle Seth
Jen and I are both pregnant. I am about 15 weeks in this picture and she is 8+ months! so fun to be in this together!
These guys were nuts, it was over 100 degrees + humidity and they were pulling bushes with super deep roots!
Kylie getting some bonding time in with Jeff and Lindsey (and elmo)!
Uncle Seth and the kiddos
Saying goodbye to his truck, we are grateful for 5 wonderful years with it!
Sweet Rio buddy
Maggy showing us her new bike, she's so cute!
Can you tell they are brothers :)?
Love this pic with Jake & Bets & the kiddos
Grandma and Rio buddy
Kylie Jo is lovin the attention from her dad and uncles
Love this one!! Uncle Chad and Kylie Jo
Traditional basketball game
We had such a wonderful trip home and soaked up every minute (minus the sick ones, haha). We wish we could've seen more people! The time always flies! We didn't get a break from the heat- we went from 105 in IL to 105 in AR...I can't wait for some cooler weather!
After some requests, I'll post some belly pictures soon :). We find out in less than 2 weeks if we are having a boy or a girl...so excited!
“Oh magnify the LORD with me and let us exalt His name
together”
(psalm 34:3)
“For this child I prayed, and the LORD has granted me my petition that I made to
him"
(1 Samuel 1:27)
Yes, that is us in the picture and it does mean that I
am pregnant and we are expecting a baby in December! December 25 or 26th
that is. Yes, I know that is Christmas. At first I had pretty mixed emotions,
“Their birthday will be overshadowed for their whole life” but then really in
the scheme of things it can be a really neat thing & we will cross that bridge when we get to it. What we
really care about is having a healthy baby, so if that means delivering on
Christmas day, then praise Jesus!!
The journey to here hasn’t been the easiest. I wrestled with
even sharing it, but Seth and I both agreed when we started this blog that we
wanted to be transparent and the only thing holding me back from sharing our
journey would be my own pride.
Everyone has their own story, none is better or
worse than another’s- just different…this is our story. So in that case, here
goes…
We were like a lot of newly married couples and talked about
“when we were going to have kids”. We started off saying “2 years into our
marriage”…2 years came quick, so we bumped it to 3 years. That was when we
thought we’d be saying in IL to have little ones. Once we joined FamilyLife and
knew we were going to be moving for a year (at that time we only thought we
would be gone one year) we decided to wait to start a family. Last July we went
to a Staff Conference for Cru out in Colorado. One morning I was doing some
quiet time and talking with God and all of a sudden I heard him tell me that we
are supposed to start trying for a family next month (august). I talked back
and said “no way God, that doesn’t fit with ‘our plan’ because I wanted to be
by family when we had kids” and the persistent answer I got was “Trust me”.
Honestly….it really wasn’t
just the fear of being away from family. The truth is, I didn’t want to start
trying for fear that it might not be possible for me to get pregnant. I didn’t
want to face that pain or impending trial. I didn’t want to go through that, I
didn’t feel brave enough or strong enough. I wanted it to come easy. But in the back of my mind I knew
God was wanting to teach me something and that terrified me. I didn’t want God to
teach me anything else, I knew everything I needed to know- right?! Haha, right Angela. I asked God if this was
going to be really hard & emotionally painful but I only heard “Trust me”.
Trust
Him. Okay, I could do that, I mean the good LORD has carried me through much
else, I could surely take a month or two of trusting Him in this journey,
right??
I shared all of this
with Seth and he told me to not be afraid and to not worry about something I didn't
even know if it would be a trial. I tried whining and complaining that I just
reaaaally didn’t want this to be one of those
trials, you know, the kind that you can’t wait to see the end of?
So began the journey and let me tell you, I had a lot of
work to be done to my heart. Who would’ve thought that God would use something
like trying for a baby to tear down some of my strongholds and inaccurate thoughts
of Him? At first it wasn’t so hard, the disappointment, the “better luck next
month”, etc. But then it got hard. The pain of discouragement, hopelessness,
“what’s wrong with me?”, “is God punishing me?”, “I
just want to quit”, and on and on. It’s an emotional rollercoaster month after
month and as much as I tried staying hopeful and positive, it was not fun. Just
to be honest. I started convincing myself that I needed to do something to
please God OR that I wasn’t doing something good enough. Guess what I learned
throughout this journey- neither one of those are true and neither one of those
reflect the character and heart of our God. I was shocked to realize how many
lies I had been believing and how easy it was to believe them, it was almost,
in a weird way, some sort of comfort- because I if I could blame “something” as
the problem then I could fix it, or
so I wanted to think at times. God helped me sort through how wrong that thinking is. Whew. I didn’t think that this would turn into
such a spiritual refinement. And I am still in the process.
Anyways. On the medical side of things, I went to a doctor
here and she talked to me about starting a pill to help me become pregnant.
Part of me thought that was a great idea and another part of me didn’t know if
I was ready for that yet & didn’t quite have a peace about it (disclaimer:
I fully believe you should do whatever God leads you to do and taking a pill is
NOT a bad thing so don’t hear me say thatAT ALL through this!). Later that same day I had an appointment with a
chiropractor. Don’t ask me why I thought a chiropractor would be able to help
me, in fact I didn’t think that she would, I thought the idea was kinda crazy.
But I went because it was an open door and a free consultation so what did I
have to lose? She told me she could help me and was so full of hope and
excitement that I decided to give that a try and hold off on the pill for now. We
changed our diet quite a bit and went whole food. We used a lot of organic
produce and meat without hormones added to it. We cut down a lot on
grains/wheat and sugars (haha, however once I started getting morning sickness
all this went out the window and I started craving my childhood foods- pizza
rolls, potatoes, and mac n cheese- good old comfort foods). I can’t & won’t
say that going to the chiropractor is what got us pregnant. It is purely up to
God and His timing, but I do believe He uses tools and people to accomplish His
plans sometimes. I don’t think it was one
specific thing.
The day I took the test I was pretty nervous and pretty
doubtful at the same time. I mean, heck, after you take so many negatives,
what’s one more?? It’s an emotional rollercoaster,
that’s what it is!! So I took the test and started walking out of the
bathroom before I even waited for results, I just figured it was negative…but
as I was walking out I noticed something that’s never been there before—two
lines. Now it doesn’t take a nurse to figure out what that means…but even as a
nurse I doubted what that meant. I think I ran in and out of the bathroom about
20 times in pure shock. My thoughts went something like this… “Me? Pregnant?
Seriously?! No way. But maybe, I mean there are two lines! But maybe the test
was a false positive (really, Angela??). No I think it’s really
real! Oh my word, I’m pregnant! What do I do? I have to tell Seth!” I ran
around a few more times and then texted Seth I needed him to come home, but he
was in meetings and couldn’t & frankly I think he was a little baffled that
I needed him to come home so urgently during a work day. So I went shopping and
bought a onesie to surprise him with. I made him a card that said
congratulations daddy & set it all out on the table. When he got home from
work later, he took one look at the card and said “are you kidding me?!”
“nope!!”. He picked me up & spun me around. I loved his genuine &
authentic excitement!
In the middle of the journey, I didn’t see an end and I
thought it would be like this forever. I wrestled a lot with God and journal-ed
out my feelings a lot. If you are going through something similar I would
recommend journaling and being honest before God with what you are feeling and
where you are at. He met with me countless time after time speaking His true
promises to me so I could hang on to them and have hope in Him alone. He didn’t
want me to hope in the doctor or in the chiropractor or in a diet change or in
anything we thought might help….He wanted my heart to hope fully in Him that He
is a good God and He has the perfect plans and the perfect timing for our
lives. He didn’t want me to compare my life to a friend’s or a stranger’s or
even to worry if it was possible. He wanted all of my trust and He wanted all
of my faith to be in Him. It was a daily give-it-over-to-God. A daily
surrender. He wanted to be more than enough for me- He wanted to be all that I
needed. He also taught me that nothing is impossible for Him and that if I call
to Him, cry out to Him, that He will tell me great and unsearchable things that
I couldn’t even imagine! Why would I put my hope in something on this earth
when God was up to something far greater than I could comprehend? So what
started as a journey of being terrified and dreading what was potentially ahead
turned into something so beautiful that only God could do. He took a trial and
peeled back some of my layers of doubt, misconceptions of Him, strongholds, and
even idols in my life and revealed His pure and perfect love for me and taught
me how to trust that no matter what He is good and has good plans for His
children…and it’s all in His timing & His ways. It’s still a hard concept to grasp when
you’re going through something. I’m sure the next time I’m in a trial I will
struggle with understanding His timing, but I have this look back at and
remember that He never left my side, He continued to whisper great and precious
promises to me, and He loves me. We can’t let our experiences skew our view of
who God is- He doesn’t change- He is who He says He is in His Word and He will
always be. He’s got a love for us that is far deeper and far purer and far more
passionate than anything we can even imagine.
I think this may be long enough. I could write and write
what I’ve learned, but you get the idea.
Also, I was listening to this song the other day as I was
reflecting on God’s faithfulness throughout my life & specifically this journey and figured if it could
help me, I know it could help someone else too…It can relate to any trial you’ve
gone or are going through...big or small…whether you have been deployed, lost a
loved one, final exams, infertility issues, marriage struggles, disease or
sickness, bad days, difficult employers, disciplining children, and the list goes on! So for whatever
you are or have or will go through- this song is for you! (Matt Redman- Never Once)
I do have to confess that when my parents, my brother & his family, and Seth’s parents came to visit- I intentionally left out some pictures on my blog because that is when we told them all we were pregnant, so now I’ll reveal the pictures.
Telling our family: It couldn't have worked out better! We already had planned for my parents to come the first weekend of may, then for my brother & his fam, and then for seth's parents...all of this was planned before we knew we were pregnant. I had always wanted to tell our families in person, if possible, and God was so good to let us tell some of our family in person! We made these shirts- "Mom & Dad" and walked out in them...let's just say they were all surprised :). For our niece, instead of us wearing our shirts, we put her in a shirt that said "cousin to be" and waited to see when jake & jen would notice, it didn't take long :)! We were able to skype with everyone else in our family, which was awesome!!
My parents- It was soo fun to tell them in person!!! Their reactions were priceless!
The shirt we made for Kylie Jo...we took her out in public in it- a little risky because we hadn't told anyone else yet, but she was so stinkin cute in it :)
The awesome weber family & baby # 2 on the way!
Seth's parents- we told them the same way we told my parents & it was sooo fun to see their reactions & celebrate with them in person!
That's our baby!
Thanks for sharing in the journey with us! We look forward to what's ahead and know we have a lot to learn :)!
About a week ago Seth's parents came down to visit us! We were so excited to have them here and show them around, since we know a lot more about the city since they were last here when they moved us in! It worked out perfectly that they could be here to celebrate Seth's birthday with us. They got in on Thursday- which was Seth's bday, so we made his favorite- spaghetti with homemade avanti's bread, green beans, fruit salad, and a simple lettuce salad. I asked him what kind of cake he wanted and he said poke cake (white cake with jello poured in it and a pudding/whipped topping icing). We opened presents and hung out together, it was a fun day!
We had so much fun with them- we took them to Pinnacle Mountain State Park, did some shopping, went to the big dam bridge, went out to eat at some fun new places neither Seth or I had tried yet, took them to our church, went swimming, played some games and did lots of talking! We tried to do as much as possible because we wanted to make the most of our time with them!
We were so sad to see them go- again, goodbyes still aren't getting easy. I can't believe how fast the weekend went but we had so much fun together!
Here's a few pictures of our weekend together:
Seth got birthday cards from Dayne & Maggy in the mail :)
Yes this is a helicopter. for adults. Over Christmas Seth kept saying how
much he wanted to get one of my brothers this for a present and then he
kept hinting that he really liked it. well, he was pretty happy to open it.
He found this book @ a bookstore here and kept talking about it, hint taken :)
Haha, so we were recently invited to a really awesome 7 year old's b-day party and
what else did we get him except the obvious- legos! Seth was pretty jealous and
wanted some of his own (I think many of you guys can relate to never growing
out of legos). SO I got him a starter pack which i'm sure we will keep adding to, haha.
27 candles!!
We took Mom & Dad to the Big Dam Bridge (if you ever visit us, it's the
must-take-every-visitor-to-spot) It is the longest pedestrian walking bridge in the US
built for that purpose and it's on top of a dam so it's pretty fun to watch.
They are watching a boat go through. I don't know
what all the technical terms are, haha.
Mom & Dad B at the bridge!
Mom was giving me sewing lessons by hand &
on my machine!! I loved it!
The guys did a project- they built us this awesome shelf
in our kitchen!!
Again, we had a blast and can't wait for y'all to come back and visit again!!
