This day rolls around every year. And every year it just seems to get harder. Tomorrow is my biggest brother, Tony's, birthday. and he is celebrating it with Jesus. It's been almost 10 years we've not been able to tell him happy birthday or make him a cake. Almost 10 years without seeing his contagious smile or be embraced by one of his strong & loving hugs. He set the standard for us kids...we looked up to him so much.
He was just so cool. Each one of us is who we are today because of the ways he has shaped our lives. In 22 years he impacted his family & friends & perfect strangers more than anyone i've ever met...seriously. He wasn't afraid of living. He wasn't afraid of what other people thought. Mostly, he wasn't afraid to love, like crazy. He wore his heart on his sleeve & anyone that knew him, knew they were loved by him. He could press my buttons & get me steaming like noone ever could, yet in 2 seconds he could twist my heart around his finger & remind me how much he loved me and how he just had to give me a hard time out of love. He was the person who could make me the most mad & feel the most loved at the same time. He taught me how to forgive well...he did not hold grudges & always came back with a hug. I miss him, Oh I miss him so much. I miss talking to him. He taught me about being genuine & not doing something just because it was "the cool thing to do", but to be real. He was a dreamer. He could cast a vision & we'd be sold on how great of an idea it was. He was the most passionate person i've ever known in my life. He has inspired me to never settle for just "okay". He pursued life with a passion and love that i've never seen before or since. Sometimes when I start thinking about him, the flood gates open & all my memories come alive again...I love it. I love thinking about him & remembering him.
Our family just misses him, we miss the life he brought to our family. We just ache for him. I cannot wait to see him again. I can't wait to have a hug from him again. He blessed my life more than I'll ever be able to put to words. He taught me some of the most valuable lessons I've ever learned. He was a leader, a fearless & courageous man who pursued, with incredible passion, how to love & live life to the fullest.
Happy Birthday, Tony! We are celebrating the life you lived & the gift your life was to us. We are forever changed because of you & how you loved us with no reserve. Blue skies, Tony! Heaven is closer every day.
Hugs to you Ang... Whenever I sing or read of heaven I invision meeting Doug again, I'm sure you do the same with Tony. Heaven is so much closer when you have a loved one there. Love you, praying for you.
ReplyDeleteJacki